Postings from December 1-31, 2002

Date: December 26, 2002  

Merry (late) Christmas, folks,

Happy is doing very well (better than me - he has good drugs and I have nada).  By the weekend the surgeon will have taken a look at the latest surgery, but all preliminary reports are very promising!

Ok, but I'm not going to whine.  Instead, I'm going to be bold and share something that our wonderful friend JeWitch sent.  Let's all enjoy the good laugh.  Happy will be fine (after he gets out of the hospital and I can spoil him properly) and when he can once again rest his weary tushe on the throne and do his own damn crossword puzzles until his legs go numb.  Here's to you, Happy.  May you never have to go through this again.  And thanks to all of you for continuing to plod through my useless drivel.  

WindNWillows

Holiday Eating Tips

By, JeWitch

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately.  Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly.  Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

 3. If something comes with gravy, use it.  That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone.   Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes.   Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother?  It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you  have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention.  They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost.   I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

 

Date: December 21, 2002  

Hi Again Everyone,

Sorry, but no Happy again today.  He will most likely be in the hospital for another couple of weeks.  They are keeping him very busy by using him as a pin cushion and making him walk around, but I know he would rather be here answering all your letters.  He just has one more small surgery to go this week and then there will definitely be light at the end of the tunnel. Things are progressing very well and soon he'll be back.  Keep up the good thoughts and I'll be back (but hopefully not too much more) with an update next week or sooner if we have an E.T.H. (Estimated time to Happy).   

WindNWillows

 

Date: December 14, 2002  

Dear Readers,

Thought I would write with another chapter in the continuing saga of Happy's Hospital Adventure.  He had to have another small surgery at the beginning of the week, but is doing remarkably well today.  When he is not asleep he is joking and giving us a hard time.  And, although I would just love to repeat some of the things he said under the "influence" I think I like my relationship just fine and will keep my mouth shut.  I can't say when he'll be back, but I can say that things are progressing very nicely and I think it will be sooner than we thought.  I told him about St. Theresa's Get Well Guestbook (by the way - NICE JOB!) and he was very touched.  So keep the good thoughts coming and know that he'll be just fine.  Thank you all again for your kindness.

WindNWillows

 

Date: December 8, 2002  

Dear Readers,

Happy is recovering nicely and is getting a lot of attention and TLC from his nurses (and us, of course).  Thank you for your wishes - I know that when he comes home he's going to head right over to the computer to check this page!  Until then, I will keep you posted. Thank you again for your kind thoughts.

WindNWillows

 

Date: December 2, 2002  

Dear Readers,

Happyshrink had surgery yesterday to correct a problem that has to do with a hernia that he has.  He is still very sick and will most likely be in the hospital for a couple of weeks.  I know that there are those of you that would like to wish Happy well, and by this afternoon there will be a link on this page for you to do so.  I would ask that you refrain from sending individual e-mail because I just won't be able to go through it all and I think it will be nicer for him to have all your thoughts and wishes in one place.  I'll update you all this weekend (with good news).  Thank you for your understanding.

WindNWillows

Note from St. Theresa:

Happy's Get Well Guest Book is here.

Date: December 1, 2002  

Hi Everyone,

Happy is still sick!  :(  There will not be a posting today, but he hopes to be back next week.  

 

Back to "Ask Happyshrink" Home Page Back to most current postings